I find emotions somewhat hard to fathom, my own and other peoples, ironic really since the stuff of people’s feelings is pretty much my day job.
But I find it hard to read people, I rely on context cues to really help me work out what people must be feeling and in some ways to work out what I am feeling. Often though I am without adequate context to really get a handle on things and without the context I find myself swimming in a sea of unease, unable to discern what my response should be.
I guess we learn about emotions in our early years and maybe I missed out on much of that, funny that I never really noticed how disabling this kind of mind-blindness is until recently. Somehow I always managed. I guess I still do, but the anxiety is magnified of late.
Maybe one day I’ll learn to understand what is going on in myself and in others without needing all the clues I rely on so much at the moment.
Maybe one day I won’t think of my feelings as a problem to be solved…..maybe one day I won’t think about them at all, and I will be able to just let them be what they are while they are.